There’s a quiet, often unsettling feeling that comes with being stuck.

You know what you want — maybe a new job, better balance, or to get into better shape — but despite your effort and intention, progress feels elusive. The path forward is obscured and often making even small steps forward feels impossible.

If you’ve ever been there, you’re not alone.

And what I've learned is that feeling stuck is not a sign of failure or laziness. It’s a signal — an invitation to pause and see things differently.

In the past, when I felt stuck, I tried different approaches — work harder, think positive, push through — but the feeling stayed (and the progress wasn't noticeable).

Things changed when I started applying concepts from my background in engineering and mathematical optimization. Surprisingly, these ideas helped me see why we get stuck and what mindset shifts open new pathways forward.

[Don’t worry, I’m not getting technical.] Let me walk you through this idea.

In mathematical modeling, every problem has constraints — limits or conditions that define which solutions are possible. And the set of solutions satisfying all constraints is called the feasible region.

I realized that feeling stuck is fundamentally a mindset problem, and that the same kind of thinking used to craft and solve mathematical problems can help us get unstuck.

Specifically, we each have “mindset constraints”—  the beliefs, assumptions, fears, and unspoken “rules” we carry.  And the combination of those mindset constraints creates our own personal feasible region. This region defines which goals, outcomes, and actions feel possible or realistic to each of us right now. When we feel stuck, it simply means that our goal is outside of the feasible region created by our current mindset.

If that feels a bit abstract, think of your mindset constraints like a fence around a garden. Once you choose the size and shape of your garden and install the fence, you’re limited to growing and nurturing plants within those boundaries — the space you have to grow is the garden’s feasible region.

The good news? In gardening, you can change the size and shape of your garden if you decide to have more plants. Similarly, your mindset constraints aren’t fixed — they can be adjusted to create more space as you set and update your goals.

When I started to look at feeling stuck as a mindset problem, I discovered new and exciting ways forward.

Let’s apply this thinking to an example. Imagine we have a set of mindset constraints that included thoughts like:

• “There are many other careers that would bring me a greater sense of purpose.”
• “I’m too old to change careers.”

These thoughts shape the options we see, the actions that feel doable, and ultimately, which goals feel within reach. So if our goal is to find work that is more meaningful, the combination of these constraints can leave us feeling stuck.

When we feel stuck, it’s often because our goal lies outside that feasible region — beyond our constraints. No matter how hard we try, we’re locked out of what we want because the internal rules prevent it from feeling real or safe.

That’s why pushing harder or “just thinking positive” often falls flat. You’re trying to move forward in a mental space that hasn’t shifted. (It’s like trying to break through the fence to plant something new — but you can’t just walk through it.)

So what do we do?  Here’s the unconventional part: instead of “reprogramming”, battling or bypassing your mindset constraints, what if we focused on shifting them? (Gently pushing on the fences so that you have extra space to plant more flowers.)

How do we shift mindset constraints? With what I call well-engineered affirmations.

Unlike generic affirmations you might have heard or used, well-engineered affirmations are carefully crafted, precise statements designed to gently shift, relax and reframe the specific mindset constraints holding you back from your goals.

In our example above, the mindset constraint:
“There are many other careers that would bring me a greater sense of purpose.”

and conflicts with:
“I’m too old to change careers”  (and making us feel stuck).

Well-engineered affirmations to help move forward could be:

“I embrace my experience as a source of strength. Meaningful work naturally builds from what I already know.”

Well-engineered affirmations invite you to reframe your mindset constraints, expand your feasible region and consider new possibilities that align with your goals.

So when you next feel stuck, what if instead of fighting it or surrendering to it, you paused — tuned inward, noticed which thoughts are shaping that stuck feeling, and considered gentle ways to shift them?

That simple shift may just be the most powerful way forward.

I invite you to experiment with this shift. Start identifying your own mindset constraints with curiosity rather than judgment. See what happens when you treat feeling stuck as a mindset problem.

To get started, I invite you to watch my video Get Clear on Why You Are Stuck (An Unconventional Approach from a PhD Engineer), where I share more about mindset constraints and review practical examples to help you understand how mindset constraints make us feel stuck and how to move forward.

If you want personalized insight on your unique mindset constraints and support to identify new pathways forward, I encourage you to get your personalized Get Unstuck Mindset Map.

Mindset engineering is the broader methodology I use that applies engineering principles to mindset work. It’s about identifying constraints, mapping your feasible region, and iterating shifts over time to create meaningful change.

I also encourage you to join the r/SmartCapableStuck community, where fellow smart, capable people explore mindset shifts, get unstuck and support each other.